Broken hearts and unfulfilled promises can be so discouraging.
It’s so easy to be frustrated, to lose focus, and to act out when we feel that our hearts aren’t being taken care of. When we feel as though we are missing out.
The world tells us that we need to be happy. We need to FEEL in order to DO. But oftentimes for me, I have to move forward in DOING what God asks me to do before my heart FEELS up for the challenge.
I don’t always feel convinced that God is working on the other side of my mountain. More often than not, I feel like I am plugging along, waiting on the impossible, just trying to get through my day. There are little windows of hope, conviction, and sight of the end of the tunnel…but the majority of my journey is trust. Trusting that what God told me was truly God telling me. Trusting that He’s still working on my impossibilities. Trusting that He has a plan.
The breakthrough days are few. They’re drops of rain in a parched desert. They don’t come all the time, but they are there and they can’t be denied.
My obedience cannot rely on my FEELINGS. If that were the case, I would be here. I would be there. I would be all over the place.
My obedience needs to rely on my relationship with God and what He has told me to do.
Recently, my journey has been an emotional struggle. I know it won’t always be like this, but this is a season of survival.
Pushing through each day.
Praying that God will give me the strength to follow His calling for my life.
Daily asking for help.
Continual refocusing in order to just make it through one day.
Refocus. Refocus. Refocus. I literally think these words over and over again when I feel like my mind is wandering or looking to things that it shouldn’t. And this happens often.
My singleness isn’t easy.
My heart wants to be married, to start a family, to be loved and to love. But that isn’t what God is asking of me right now.
And so my singleness is a living sacrifice that I give up to the Lord daily. It is my surrender to Him, my gift, knowing that this season will bring me to something…and that something will bring Glory to God.
And even though it may feel impossible and unfair at times, I know that God sees my sacrifice and will bless it.
But, as He has whispered to me lately, I need to do this for Him and no other reason. And this focus is literally the only thing getting me through and helping me stay obedient.